Underground Pagans

Last week I talked to my brother Bill on the phone. I asked what he was up to for New Year’s Eve. He said he was going to a party in an underground bunker with pagans. If that wasn’t strange enough, I thought he said he was going to a party in an underground bunker with vegans. You have to understand that I have very poor hearing and even with an amplifier on my phone and a hearing aid, my world is full of absurdities based on what I think I hear and the arc of distance between that and what someone actually said. I have a very amusing life because I hear all kinds of things that were not said. By-the-way, I have nothing against vegans or pagans. I have been a vegan at times. I suspect I have been a pagan at times too. According to Webster a pagan is “one who has little or no religion and who delights in sensual pleasures and material goods.” Why anyone who delights in sensual pleasures would be living in an underground bunker eludes me. I thought sensual folk were a bit partial to sunlight. As for the material goods, it strikes me that anyone living in an underground bunker is trying to economize on housing, which might preclude an attachment to material goods. What kind of food do you suppose underground pagans serve at a party? My guess is turnips in a dark chocolate sauce. What do you think? Perhaps they are underground pagan vegans. There’s a concept. I’ll have to call Bill to get the details.