Posts
I won’t be blogging next Sunday because I’ll be at Akili and
Tina’s wedding in SoCal. Is my son really getting married? Pinch me. I have
moments when I feel like I fell down a rabbit hole.
The first time I met Tina was when Akili brought her home
for Sudi’s high school graduation in 2009. From the minute I saw the two of
them together, I knew this was the one for Akili. They were quite simply
completely comfortable with each other. He was so much himself with her. They
fit. Tina has been a part of our family ever since. In fact, it seems as though
she and Akili are already married. The wedding will give those of us present a
moment to step into a place outside of time where we can take a breath and formally
celebrate this lifelong partnership.
As the wedding approaches, my daughter sent me a link to an amusing
collection of children’s views about marriage. The children answered questions
posed by an interviewer. When asked the proper age to get married, Camille, age
10, answered, “23 is the best age because you know the person forever by then.”
When asked how a stranger could tell if two people were married, Derrick, age
8, answered, “You might have to guess based on whether they seem to be yelling
at the same kids.” In response to a
question about conversations while on a date, Lynette, age 8, noted “Even boys
have something to say if you listen long enough.” Ricky, age 10, gave the
following advice for making a marriage work, “Tell your wife that she looks
pretty, even if she looks like a truck.” I think one of the best suggestions
about taking care of your wife that I have read recently was the one that
recommended to men that if their wife seemed out of sorts they should hug her
and tell her she’s beautiful and if she growls then they should retreat to a
safe distance and throw chocolate at her. Works for me.
The word “wedding” has always felt ancient to me. It has not
changed much from the Old English form “weddian” or the Middle English “wedde.”
A wedding, a symbolic joining of two souls, seeing them “wed,” is an old, old
ritual. Witnessing a wedding feels nearly primitive. Attending the wedding of
two people who are terrific together and who have an excellent relationship is
up there at the top as one of the most wonderful experiences in life. How
remarkable that these two young people found each other in this crazy, mixed-up
world? That alone is cause for celebration. So many people go their whole lives
and never meet someone to partner with, never find that special person. I
rejoice that it happened for my son; and that the woman he found comes from a
family who values family above all else and cherishes its children
passionately. Her family adores Tina’s little niece and nephews! It will be the
same with us as well one day when we have grandchildren. Akili could not have
found a finer family to join.
I have accomplished many things in this life, yet none more
significant to me than raising my three children. Nothing makes me happier than
being surrounded by their chatter and basking in their presence. To see my
Akili wed will be one of the greatest joys of my life and will certainly undo
me when I watch his beautiful bride come down the aisle. I just hope they don’t
play “Sunrise, Sunset” from Fiddler on
the Roof at the festivities, because I could certainly go through a box of
Kleenex on that song. My daughter and soon-to-be daughter-in-law insist that I have to wear makeup, so I
bought waterproof mascara at Macy’s. This will be a strong
test of the waterproofness of Macy’s mascara.
Every morning when I walk, I tell the trees that my wish for
my children is that they will love their lives as much as I am loving mine. My big-hearted
jolly baby boy is grown and about to take a bride. The years march by so
swiftly. I am filled with gratitude for all of it. More, please.
Where is the little
girl at play?
I don’t remember
growing older.
When did they?
Sunrise, sunset;
sunrise, sunset;
Swiftly flow the
years,
One season following
another,
Laden with happiness
and tears.
No comments:
Post a Comment